Who the hell designs all this God-awful software these days? There is more poorly written, unstable, insultingly-hand-holdy but slightly glamorous software in existence today than there are water molecules in, on and around the Earth.

Everything feels the need to hold your hand through every single activity you might want to do and most don’t even offer a way of disabling these pointless features. I probably wouldn’t complain if I could see even a wafer-thin shred of usefulness, but I genuinely can’t. Typical example of this being that immensely annoying protection method of everyone’s favourite IM client: MSN Messenger. Whoever the hell decided that it should decide to block access to some files with certain extensions to “protect your security” should be shot in the leg and thrown to the rapists.

“Protect your security,” what a ridiculous statement.

So someone sends me an MP3 file that they’ve recorded themselves and asks for my opinion, but of course I can’t just fucking click “Open blah.mp3″ because that would cause MSN to block access to the file to protect my security. So I need to open My Recieved Files every single time someone sends me any file that isn’t a picture. Funny how it can be circumvented so easily but can’t be turned off, even if you have a certified Virus Scanner installed. Seriously, how is this a good feature? All it adds to the mix is a massive heaped dose of for fucks sake. Windows has that insultingly hand-holding Security Centre but at least you can turn it off.

Some programs even think they have the right to control your computer for you. That’s novel isn’t it? Far too often, I’ve been trying to log into something using one of those supposed-to-be-secret password things only to have some program steal the top-level focus and demand it be updated. Why the fucking hell do programmers make this feature so aggressive? Most of the time the programs that demand attention are programs I don’t even use often. DivX is a prime example of that. Only time I ever use DivX is when I feel the need to watch a game or film trailer in high-definition and considering both get churned out at mass-production studios that is a very rare occurrence.

So I’m trying to check my email and DivX grabs the foreground, eats half of my no longer secret password, and demands I update it due to security issues… Ironic really isn’t it?

When I installed it I was not prompted with the question “Do you want DivX to check for updates?” Nor was I prompted with “Do you want DivX to start with Windows?” Far too many programs just whack themselves in the list of shit that starts with Windows just to bog your system down without asking. Only programs I want to start with Windows are Winamp, Messenger, Steam and AVG. Yet I look in my StartUp folder (the archaic method) to find three programs, none of which I’ve approved to launch on boot; and sixteen in the registry. Three of those are NVidia related and two reference exactly the same program as one shortcut in StartUp!

Where’s the manners gone in software development? Back in simpler times when Windows was young, temperamental, unstable and grey, applications were so much more friendly. They’d never grab your attention unless it was actually justified, and installers would ask you about everything and wouldn’t force you to install on the C drive to increase performance by 0.01%. Some applications would even sense if you’re in full screen mode and leave you the fuck alone if you were, but not these days. Any program will interrupt anything you’re doing for any reason whatsoever.

In the middle of writing a document? Sure, it’ll interrupt, eat the rest of your sentence and possibly even crash Word for you.

In the middle of a heated battle in some awesome game? Hells yes it’ll interrupt, probably get you killed and crash the game for you if you’re lucky.

In the middle of a download that you thought you could leave going while you nip downstairs to get a cup of tea? Of course! Windows update will run, install updates and restart your computer without the foresight of asking your permission!

Oh the wonders of the digital age! :-D